As most of you know, I have been struggling over the past few months with my upcoming divorce. One of the lessons I feel like I am finally starting to grasp is that fact that Jesus didn’t promise to give us an EASY abundant life. He simply said HE would give us life and life abundantly. Paul tells us that in this life we will face all kinds of trials. James says that we can count it joy when we encounter trails of various kinds, because this testing of our Faith produces endurance. I think spiritual maturity is always our goal, but surprisingly we aren't the one's who dictate how this growth occurs.
While I am living out this extreme testing, and persevering, and trying so hard to find the joy, hearing these words from God isn’t easy. Honestly, it’s rather painful! It hurts to know that struggles in this life are pretty much guaranteed. At the same time I am starting to learn more about the importance of these struggles.
I am currently sitting on a plane flying to my favorite state, California. I have only flown here once before, but I experienced the exact same thing during my last flight.
Turbulence…. Like LOTS of it.
I have flown a lot in the last 10 years, but I have never gotten used to the plane hitting turbulence. That is usually the point during my trip where I prayed the most . I would say something along the lines of “Lord, I do want to go home, but I really don’t want to experience what it feels like to fall from the sky”. What I am realizing though is that I could easily bow out. I could say “you know what, the turbulence scares me, and it’s really not fun so I think I will stay on the East Coast from now on”, or I could struggle. I could fear falling, crashing, and dying a scary death to get where I’m going. So I do, because where I end up is worth the struggle.
You see that’s the point I am finally getting to on this journey, a place of surrender. A place where I can say Lord, this ride is crazy bumpy, and it scares me, keeps me on the edge of my seat, and my kids are scared too, but I trust that where I’m headed is worth facing my fears. I won’t give up, and I won’t stop flying for you, because you warned me about the turbulence Lord, and you made me a promise about my destination. So I will give up my desire to be in control, and I will trust you to direct my life, even if you fly me through the choppiest course imaginable, because I trust you. I know you are only going to do what’s best for me.
What about you? Do you feel stuck in the turbulence of life? What could God be trying to teach you?
How I view the turbulence is starting to change how I handle it, and that feels like progress!