A few weeks have passed since my husband of almost 10 years told me he wanted a divorce. I have prayed daily since that day that he wouldn’t file, then he did. That he would change his mind before I signed, he didn’t.
So today I am facing the papers. I have decided that even though I do not want to break my marriage covenant by signing the papers, it would be a lot more peaceful just to do it. I love my husband, and I don’t want to make him mad or hurt him. He feels the need to do this, and our laws will allow him to do it, so I don’t feel like I should fight it.
I will not give up on my marriage. I will pray for my husband every single day that he is in OCS. I will pray that God will change his heart, both towards me and Him. He has walked away from God because he feels like God has abandon him and let bad things happen in his life. I can completely understand where he is coming from. I could have easily said the same thing about this situation. I have thought Why? Why God would you allow this. You see that’s the thing about free will, if we didn’t have a choice and had to walk in God’s will we wouldn’t be on Earth, we would be in Heaven where life is perfect. I also know without a doubt that God uses these times of pain and heartache to draw His children back to Him.
That is exactly what has happened on my my side, and I pray that’s what happens with my husband. I pray that God will not let him rest or have peace until he returns to the One who loves him most.
There are times when I feel like I don’t know what this life holds for me and the children, but here are a few things I do know:
- God is always Good!
- He has plans for my life that will give me both hope and a future
- He is making me more like His son Jesus
- God will protect me and will never forsake me
- God knows the end of the story, so I can follow Him because He has got this under control. That may mean that His path for my life is a lot different than the one I have clung to for so many years, but I have prayed for change, and now I am seeing the answer to that prayer.
I am resting in these truths today!